Truth be told, I ate “real” breakfast as a kid. Bowls of Cheerios with milk, buttered sourdough with a glass of chocolate Instant Breakfast. Days when I had time I’d even eat some frozen waffles, cut into strips so I could dunk them in warmed maple syrup. There is only one time I can recall either my older sister or myself eating anything far off that radius: home from college, my sister had woken up later than my mother and myself. On her way out the door, she grabbed an orange soda and a peanut butter cookie. Even then, at age twelve or so, eating a cookie for breakfast just seemed… well, wrong.
Enter present times. Breakfast is often coffee with an everything bagel and hummus, or a frozen tofu scramble pocket. Sometimes I make myself a smoothie after my morning workout.
But I still think about the idea of breakfast cookies. A shortage in the pantry lead to something functional, tasty, satisfying and yup, ugly. The name inspiration drawn from a recent quickfire challenge on the television show Top Chef All Stars, where the chefs had to make cookies for Tully, Elmo and Cookie Monster from Sesame Street.
Yes, I named my choc-oat-chip breakfast cookies after a fertilizer/source of fuel/what the side of Highway 5 near the Harris Beef Ranch smells like. However, unlike their namesake, you can pick these up and eat them, lick your fingers, and be happy.
Sick sense of humor much?
This recipe is a mutilated rendition of the oatmeal raisin cookies from Veganomicon. They’re lazy-girl status, so comment if you have any questions!
Cow Pies, or Choc-Oat Chip Breakfast Cookies if you’re squeamish
makes over 2 dozen 2T cookie pucks
1/2 c canola oil
1/3 c brown rice syrup
1/2 c non-dairy milk
3/4 c brown sugar, packed
1/4 c whole wheat flour
1 c all-purpose flour
1/2 c white whole wheat flour
1/2 c cocoa powder
3/4 tsp baking soda
3/4 tsp baking powder
1/2 tsp salt
2 generous c rolled oats
1-1 1/2 c chocolate chips (whatever floats your boat)
Turn your oven on to 350F. In your mixing bowl, combine the sugar, brown rice syrup and oil; mix till well combined. Sift together dry ingredients (I admit to sifting each directly into the bowl) and add in two batches. Briefly mix the oats and milk; add to the mix with the chocolate chips. Mix till just combined; dough may not stick together well or seem stiff. Using your favorite cookie scoop, pack each scoop firmly using the side of the bowl and drop onto a prepared cookie sheet. (Don’t have a scoop? Roll your dough into a well-packed ping-pong-ball-like ball.) Once the cookies are on the sheet, press each one down slightly to flatten to about 1/2″ or so. Bake for 10-12 minutes, let cool about five minutes on the cookie sheet before moving to a cooling rack. Eat. Pretend you’re being completely healthy and guilt-free, reminding yourself (dark) chocolate can be good for you. Laugh ’cause they look like little turdy pucks. Enjoy.